


friends in the dark

by okamiwind



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Obsession, Dom/sub Undertones, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Self-cest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2020-11-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:09:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27621175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okamiwind/pseuds/okamiwind
Summary: ever felt a draw coming from an open window, the cold running down your spine like a lit line of gasoline? ever felt the pull of the shadows only to find that it's nothing more than tree branches scratching along the window?loving bäekhyun is like that. loving bäekhyun is like loving the very worst, very best part of him.stereophonic, radioactive, fantastic, apocalyptic. hyperdrive, crystal clear, and absolutely fucking shimmering in the black of night.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Byun Baekhyun
Comments: 14
Kudos: 45





	friends in the dark

**Author's Note:**

  * For [glittrsoo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/glittrsoo/gifts).



Baekhyun knows that it is a bad idea, but there’s just something about the other half of him that calls. Like a siren’s song, beckoning him under. Down into the depths. 

What would the water taste like at the bottom of the ocean? Sweet? 

“What are you thinking about?” Minseok asks, lying on his cot. 

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun says, and he scrubs at his face with a careless hand. “I guess I was just wondering what the difference between us is. You know. Us. Them.” 

“I wouldn’t know,” Minseok says. “Mine’s dead already.” 

“Does it feel any different now? Do you feel free?” 

“We’re in the middle of a war,” Minseok says, hands under his head. He turns to look Baekhyun in the eye, somewhere between disbelief and amusement. “Do you think any of us feel free?” 

Baekhyun sighs, and he stares at the iron beams that stretch overhead. 

They’ve been at this for as long as he can remember. They grew up like this. Became men under the blood red blanket of ultraviolence. 

And still, whenever he looks at Baëkhyun, there is a certain freedom. 

_This could have been you. This could still be you. Isn’t that wonderful?_  
  


✂

His next assignment is the following day. They’ve got new intelligence. Jongin and Sehun scouted it out in the middle of the night when everyone else was sleeping.

“You’re the best lead,” Junmyeon says, pushing the tracker into Baekhyun’s hand. It blinks green, circling, circling. “We think maybe it’s you, anyhow.” 

“Me?” Baekhyun asks, and he bites his nail. “Okay.” 

“You think you can handle it on your own?” Chanyeol asks. “I can go for backup.” 

Baekhyun stares at the circling radar. “I’ll be all right.” 

“You never know,” Sehun says. “He could blind you.” 

“It’s never bad to take someone else,” Kyungsoo says. “Just in case.” 

Baekhyun stares at him. He sounds so hollow now. The explosion. Their plans worked. Why does he sound so empty? Like his own voice is ringing, echoing inside him. _This is the death rattle_ , he thinks, staring at Kyungsoo’s dying eyes. _This is what’s left after the other is gone._

“I’ll go by myself,” Baekhyun says. “We can’t afford to lose any of you if things go south.” 

“We can’t afford to lose _you_ ,” Jongdae stresses. “Remember that.” 

Baekhyun goes to his bunk to prepare, and he thinks about the scar. It runs so deep in Baëkhyun that sometimes, Baekhyun can feel it melted into his own skin.  
  


✂

It isn’t far. He’s holed up in some barn nearby. Maybe he was sent to do some scouting of his own. Baekhyun doesn’t mind. He doesn’t particularly enjoy the journey. Too much time to think.

The surrounding areas are filled with trees, and he hides behind them as he closes in. He stares at the tracker in his hand. No movement. He doesn’t feel Baekhyun coming. 

_Or maybe he does_ , Baekhyun thinks. _Maybe he’s waiting for me. Because he wants to see me._

The countryside is pastoral, something like a dream he once had. Birds sing. Baekhyun closes his eyes, and he commits their song to memory. A picture leaps into his mind, one he is not comfortable seeing, and he shoves it away. Their hands brushing against one another. _Enough. Enough._

He stalks through the high grass along the hill, and he descends on the barn as if stalking prey. He chucks the tracker to the side as he breathes in deeply, letting himself fill with light. It’s easier in the sun. Feels natural. Like breathing. Like reflex. 

Baekhyun throws open the door to the barn, and he finds Baëkhyun there. Alone. 

He is shirtless on a bed of hay, and there are scars along his chest. Baekhyun doesn’t remember giving him any of those, but… but where else could they have come from? 

“You’re here,” Baëkhyun says simply, his eyes go white with light, and then… it begins. 

The barn burns as they fight, and if Baekhyun was anyone else, not gifted with this power, he would have gone blind just as Sehun said. But he is made from something different. Something brighter. Hotter. 

He lets it rage through him as they spar, beams collapsing around them. They dance, a quick-paced waltz. One, two, three, one, two, three. It’s as though they both know the correct steps. Maybe they choreographed this dance together. 

Baëkhyun gives him a little catlike smile, drawing attention to the red scar across his face. He doesn’t have his chain on, so it burns like a brand. 

Suddenly, Baekhyun’s instinct kicks in. He leaps backwards, and part of the roof comes smoldering to the ground between them. Baëkhyun shrugs, unimpressed. Like _I would have seen that coming too._

_Yes, of course_ , Baekhyun thinks. _Because we are parts of a whole. Two sides of the same coin._

The fires catch, and the barn collapses around them. He gives Baëkhyun his back as he turns, looking for an exit, and he finds one, part of the glowing frame giving him a small window to leap through. Baekhyun exits, and Baëkhyun follows soon after. 

The hill rages with red flame, and Baekhyun is glad he told Chanyeol to stay behind. He has trouble once the tongues start licking at his heels. It bleeds through him. Breathes into the fire. That would have been disastrous. An inferno.

Baekhyun gets the upper hand, though he doesn’t think it’s because of his style, his effort, his skill. He thinks it might just be because Baëkhyun is tired. Perhaps he just woke up. He is still ruffled with sleep, his hair… his white hair. 

The field of fire burns around them, a small ring that’s closing, closing. Baekhyun chases him back toward the edge, back through the smoke and the light and the darkness. The sky is blood red and filled with smoke overhead, and Baëkhyun collapses as the fire burns him along his leg. 

He finds himself staring down at Baëkhyun, confused why he hasn’t obliterated him into ash, fuel for the fire. 

“You should get something for your leg,” Baekhyun whispers, and the fires devour, inching closer and closer. 

“Kill me,” Baëkhyun says. 

“I won’t.” 

Baëkhyun stares blankly at him. “What does this mean?” 

“I… I don’t want to hurt you,” Baekhyun whispers. “So go.” 

“Kill me,” Baëkhyun says, eyes so full of… something. _Life_ , Baekhyun thinks. “Hurry. They sent me for that purpose.” 

“You came here to die?” 

“You didn’t?” Baëkhyun asks, mouth curling into a smile. “They sent you here for the same reason, didn’t they? They assumed one of us would die.” 

“Why would they assume it would be me?” 

“Because I am good at what I do,” Baëkhyun says. 

Baekhyun looks around as the fires eat. 

“Not better than me,” Baekhyun says. 

“That kind of thing suits me better than it suits you,” Baëkhyun says pridefully, cocky even at the edge of death. “But you know that, don’t you?” 

It sends Baekhyun spiraling. There in the cold red field, the burning flames like knives, the words unsaid like bullets… Baekhyun realizes he could never kill him. Never in a million lifetimes. No matter what. 

“Go home,” Baekhyun tells him. “Go back to where you came from, and don’t ever come to me again. Because the next time I see you, I’ll kill you. Do you hear me? I’ll fucking kill you.” 

He reaches down, and they share matching scars across the backs of their hands. Baekhyun had never noticed before, but he notices then. He pulls Baëkhyun to his feet, and Baëkhyun smiles like he knows a secret. Like he’ll never tell. 

“Next time you try to threaten someone, see if you can try to make yourself _mean_ it,” Baëkhyun says, and he leaps through the fire, leaving Baekhyun on his own.  
  


✂

They descend upon him as he’s using the shower stall, and he rolls his eyes. Tables, turning.

He rinses the ash away from his face, head tilted back under the pitiful spray. 

“He got away,” he explains. “I don’t know. It was difficult.” 

“You’ve been burned,” Yixing notes. “Along your leg.” 

Baekhyun looks down, turns his leg to the side. He wears a mottled red in the same place that Baëkhyun did. 

“Y-Yeah,” Baekhyun says. “I don’t know. There was a lot of fire.” 

“Well, we’re just glad you’re okay,” Junmyeon says. 

“Yeah,” Baekhyun says, thinking back to the look in Baëkhyun’s eyes as he stared at him, practically drenched in flame. “Me too.”  
  


✂

No matter what he’s feeling, no matter what goes on inside his head, the war rages on. It’s really the only constant. He doesn’t know what he’s imagining, even, letting Baëkhyun go like that. It was low treason at best. And for what? What did he think would happen? The war would end? That they could… that they could live in harmony?

He chides himself for such childish thoughts, but still, such thoughts come as they please. He cannot control himself any longer. Something has been severed. 

Perhaps that’s why he finds himself staring at Baëkhyun again in one week’s time, only now, their positions are reversed. 

Baëkhyun looks his part, chain firmly in place along his face, challenging Baekhyun as he stares down the bridge of his nose with a grin. 

“I think in some way, you know that this is where you belong,” Baëkhyun says softly, and Baekhyun looks to the side, the battle thundering forward as Jongdae battles his counterpart. “Hey.” Baekhyun looks back at him, and Baëkhyun smiles. “That's better.” 

“I-If you want to kill me, I understand,” Baekhyun says. “You won. I concede.” 

There is quiet, but the quiet is full of sound. Baekhyun looks into his eyes. Wants to ask if Baëkhyun feels all the same things Baekhyun does. Guilt. Regret. Conflict. A little bit of something he’d call love. 

“Why did you do that?” Baëkhyun asks. “Last time.” 

“What? Spare you?” 

“You didn’t _spare_ me,” Baëkhyun scoffs, and it sounds to Baekhyun’s ears like he’s trying to convince himself. “But why would you do something stupid like that anyway?” 

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun says. “I guess I just… I just couldn’t kill you.” 

“Maybe that’s why you’re you,” Baëkhyun says, and he raises his fist, filled with white light “and I’m me.” 

“We were burned in the same place,” Baekhyun says softly, eyes slipping shut. “Right leg. Calf to ankle. The fires never touched me, but we were burned in the same place. Isn’t that funny?” 

He waits for the feeling of gamma to bleed through him. He used to experiment on himself when he was younger. Little marks on his skin. They purpled. Made his bones weak. He had to rest for a while until he was better. If it could hurt him, he reasoned, it could kill anyone easily. 

The feeling never comes, and Baekhyun opens his eyes. 

Baëkhyun gazes down at him, glassy, shocked. His mouth falls open as the light in his fist dies, as he steps back, and he runs. 

Baekhyun lifts himself up onto his elbows, body exhausted from their duel. He calls for Jongdae, and they go back to the base together for healing. 

“What happened back there?” Jongdae asks. “I thought I heard you guys… like, talking.” 

“He… he was threatening me,” Baekhyun fibs, confused by the way it sits pleasantly in his blood. “But, yeah, he got too confident. I was able to slip away. Lost him.” 

Jongdae looks at him like he doesn’t quite believe him, but they’ve never lied to each other before. Why would he start now?  
  


✂

It’s in the middle of the night, and he wakes to the sound of scratching glass. Frowning, eyes still hazy, he sits up. He’s never seen birds around the base, never seen trees. He stands up, and the rest of the team sleeps peacefully. His feet pad across the concrete floors, and he goes to the window.

There is a note stuck between inside and out, and Baekhyun opens the window to snatch it. 

His heart thrums in his neck as he unfolds the piece of paper. 

_Meet me by the mountain._

_0500._

_37.466684,128.549182._

It is unsigned, but Baekhyun knows it is him. 

In the morning, as the dawn is breaking, he goes to the coordinates, walking through the forests as his breath catches in his mouth. He stares at his GPS system in his bracelet, and he bites his lip as he approaches, as the dinging gets louder and louder, as he sees Baëkhyun’s white hair in the distance. 

He steps forward as bravely as he can manage. He can hear water in the distance. 

“Why did you come?” Baëkhyun asks, frowning like he can’t understand. 

“Why did you ask me here?” 

“Answer the question,” Baëkhyun says. “It could be an ambush. We could have all been waiting here to kill you. The weak link.” 

Baekhyun looks around. “What are they waiting for, then?” 

Baëkhyun has not worn the chain, Baekhyun notes. He looks older without it. Baekhyun can’t decide if he prefers it this way or not. 

“I don’t understand why you didn’t kill me,” Baëkhyun says.

“I could say the same for you,” Baekhyun answers. “I thought you would have. This is your second opportunity now, the second opportunity that you haven’t taken.” 

His eyes are black as he stands there, and Baekhyun steps back. 

“I don’t understand this,” Baëkhyun says. “I don’t—” 

“I think I like you,” Baekhyun whispers helplessly. “I think we could be friends.” 

“ _Friends?_ ” Baekhyun spits. “Friends, after everything that’s happened between us?” 

He has no other answer. “Yes.” 

Baëkhyun’s eyes go back to their natural blue. Cold. Baekhyun wonders why he feels so much warmth whenever he looks into them. 

“Where do we go from here?” Baëkhyun asks. “Everything’s changed now.” 

“Meet me here tomorrow night,” Baekhyun says. “2400 sharp.” 

“What if I can’t get away?” 

“Make up an excuse,” Baekhyun says. “They’ll notice I’m gone if I’m here too much longer. We can talk again then.” 

He turns, and he runs back towards their camp. They are already stirring. 

“What were you doing out?” Yixing asks, scratching at his stomach as he pads through the common area. 

“Just, you know, scouting,” Baekhyun lies again. “Keeping guard.” 

Yixing nods with a knit between his brows. “Right. Well, I was gonna start breakfast. Wanna help?” 

Baekhyun is eager for the opportunity to use his hands, so he steps forward with a smile.  
  


✂

The night is full of crackling darkness, but he has his power. Once they’ve all retired, he slips out of the base with his bag on his back, running towards the mountain.

He considers it good exercise, cardio conditioning. Junmyeon and Jongin would praise him, he tries to tell himself. He tries. He can’t muster up their support, even to himself. Even in the middle of the night. 

He walks to their spot, and he doesn’t even check his GPS. He’s memorized it now. 

Baëkhyun is already waiting there, hands shoved into his pockets as he looks towards the peak of the mountain. He listens to the laughing water as he watches him. He can’t just stare at him forever, though. He steps forward, and the snapping of a branch draws Baëkhyun’s attention. And a beam of light from his fist. 

“Hi,” Baekhyun says. “It’s just me.” 

“Hi,” Baëkhyun says. “What are we doing here?” 

Baekhyun pulls his bag from his back, and he sets it down. “Do you want to start a fire?” 

Baëkhyun frowns, but he gathers kindling and twigs before sending a shot of light at them. They begin to burn immediately, and he stacks bigger sticks on top. They all catch easily, and Baekhyun sits next to the warmth. 

Baëkhyun looks at him, confused, before he follows suit. 

“I brought some things to eat.” 

“I already ate,” Baëkhyun says. 

“When?” 

“Dinner time,” Baëkhyun answers. 

“Well, I brought this to share,” Baekhyun says. 

“Is it poisoned?” Baëkhyun asks, head tilted to the side. 

“Why would I poison it?” 

“Why would you offer me to share your food?” Baëkhyun asks. 

“B-Because I thought we had come to an understanding,” Baekhyun says. “You and me.” 

“There is no understanding,” Baëkhyun says, but he leans over to peer into Baekhyun’s open bag. “Is this a custom of your team?” 

“I guess?” 

“What does the sharing of food mean commonly?” Baëkhyun asks. 

“P-Peace, I suppose,” Baekhyun says. “Community.” 

“Are you at peace in my presence?” 

Baekhyun can’t say that he is _at peace_ , drawn between the light and the dark, but what he _can_ say is that he would rather be nowhere else. 

“Kind of,” Baekhyun answers. 

“All right,” Baëkhyun says, and he reaches into Baekhyun’s bag, taking one of the slices of bread. “What else is there?” 

“Cheese,” Baekhyun says. “Figs.” 

“You like figs?” 

“They’re my favorite,” Baekhyun says. Baëkhyun makes a soft sound. “What?” 

“They’re my favorite too.”

For some reason, it makes Baekhyun’s heart tumble inside his rib cage. 

“Well, we already knew we were similar,” Baekhyun says, trying to shove the welling storm of affection deep down inside him. 

“I hadn’t thought that our tastes might be the same,” Baëkhyun says. 

“What’s your favorite food?” 

Baëkhyun tilts his head to the side, squinting at Baekhyun. “Why do you want to know?” 

Baekhyun shrugs. “Why not?” 

Baëkhyun slices from the soft cheese, and he lays it on the bread before taking a bite. 

“I’m not picky,” Baëkhyun answers. “But I like sweet things most.” 

Baekhyun bites his lip as he reaches into the bag, passing Baëkhyun one of the figs. 

“They’re really good,” Baekhyun says. “There’s a tree near—” 

“I know,” Baëkhyun smirks. “I saw it.” 

“Right.” 

Baekhyun watches as Baëkhyun takes the stem between his forefinger and thumb, pinching it off before tossing it into the fire. He looks into Baekhyun’s eyes as he lets his teeth sink into the flesh of the fruit. As he chews, swallowing with a roll of his throat, a drop of the juice rolls down from the corner of his mouth, and Baekhyun instinctively reaches forward to brush it away. 

Baëkhyun takes his wrist in a firm hand, holding Baekhyun still. He takes Baekhyun’s thumb into his mouth, sucking the juice from it as Baekhyun gasps. 

“W-What are you doing?” Baekhyun asks, his stomach bottoming out with lust. 

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” Baëkhyun asks, eyes wide, brows raised. “I thought you wanted to fuck me. Why else would you bring me here?” 

“T-To be my friend,” Baekhyun says. 

Baëkhyun drops Baekhyun’s wrist.

“Friend?” he asks. 

“Is that so difficult to understand?” Baekhyun asks. 

“Well, yes,” Baëkhyun says, and he shakes his head. “Sex, I could understand. Friendship…” 

Baekhyun is immediately plunged into the blood warm pool of shame, and he begins to pack up his things. 

“You know what?” Baekhyun says. “This was a mistake. I don’t know what I was thinking. I-I guess I just thought, I don’t know, I guess I was out of my fucking mind.” 

“Don’t say that,” Baëkhyun says. “Sit down.” 

“No.” 

“Sit,” Baëkhyun says a bit more sternly. 

“No,” Baekhyun says. “Or what, you’ll kill me? I mean, it’s not like we’re friends. We’re supposed to be _enemies._ ” 

Baëkhyun sighs. 

“I won’t tell you again,” Baëkhyun says. “Sit. Let’s finish.” 

Baekhyun stands there, and he wants to shift his weight from foot to foot. It would look weak, so he avoids it. It takes a moment, but he sits back down, and he unpacks his food again. Baëkhyun takes another bite of his fig, chewing, swallowing

“I’m only staying because I wanted to eat,” Baekhyun says, and he takes a slice of bread, a slice of the soft white cheese, a slice of fresh fig on top of it. “For no other reason.” 

“Sure,” Baëkhyun says. “Of course.” 

Baekhyun bites into his bread, and he tastes salt and sugar in equal measure.  
  


✂

From then on, they talk. Talk about everything. About the war, about their teams. Secrets that shouldn’t be passed back and forth. It makes Baekhyun’s throat go tight with emotion. There is some trust building up, stacking up like stones in their midnights. Baekhyun brings fresh figs from the tree outside the base, and Baëkhyun brings black bread that tastes earthy and wholesome.

“I didn’t know you baked,” Baekhyun says. 

“There’s a lot you still don’t know about me,” Baëkhyun says, and he lowers a shoulder coyly. “Lots.” 

“Stop,” Baekhyun chastises. 

“See, that’s it,” Baëkhyun says, pointing an accusatory finger at him. “That’s why our teams could never get along really.” 

“Not because you are the antithesis of everything we believe?” Baekhyun asks. “Not because you are the worst of us? Because you want to hurt us? To kill us?” 

“Do you still think all that stuff?” 

Baekhyun shrugs. “I don’t know. Sometimes.” 

“You think I wanna kill you?” 

“Maybe sometimes,” Baekhyun smiles. “Whenever I don’t agree with you.” 

Baëkhyun smiles to himself. “Yeah.” 

“But… what were you gonna say?” Baekhyun asks. “Before. About our teams getting along.” 

“Ah,” Baëkhyun grins, and he bites his lip, something that feels like deja vu. “Yeah. Don’t worry about it.” 

“Now I have to know.” 

“I think it’s better this way,” Baëkhyun says. 

“No, come on,” Baekhyun says. “You know me. It’ll eat at me forever. I’ll never be able to forget about it.” 

“Sounds like a personal problem.” 

“Come on,” Baekhyun needles, and he scoots a little closer, the warmth of Baëkhyun’s body stronger than the fire, he thinks. “Tell me.” 

Baëkhyun smiles at him, bumping his shoulder against Baekhyun’s. “You really wanna know?” 

“Yeah, I really wanna know.” 

Baëkhyun grins. “It’s because you guys _think_ you’re so different from us. You _act_ like you’re so different, but in reality, you know, we aren’t different at all. We’re not two sides of the same coin. We’re the same side.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“You act so, you know, repressed and mannered and everything,” Baëkhyun says. “But I know what kind of shit goes through your head. You might blush and laugh and tell me to stop, but… but you’re just as dirty as I am. Just as violent. You like fucking and fighting just as much as I do.” 

Baekhyun goes hot, and he scoots back. 

“I don’t know if you know me as good as you think you do,” Baekhyun says. 

“I know you a lot fuckin’ better than you think,” Baëkhyun says, and he gestures between them. “Remember. Same side.” 

Baekhyun resists the urge to close the gap again between them, to put his body against Baëkhyun’s so that he could drink the heat away from him. 

He blinks the thought away, and he grabs a bit of the bread. 

It tastes like home.  
  


✂

Baëkhyun leans back on his hands, fingers in the dirt. He stares at Baekhyun, and Baekhyun turns away, looks at the stars instead.

“What’s Sehun planning?” 

“What?” 

“You heard me,” Baëkhyun says. 

“I dunno,” Baekhyun says. “I hadn’t heard anything.” 

“Been kinda quiet lately,” Baëkhyun says. “You know what that means.” 

_Something big coming_ , Baekhyun thinks. 

“I dunno,” Baekhyun says. “They haven’t told me anything.” 

“Hm.” 

“What?” 

“Nothing.” 

“No, tell me,” Baekhyun says. 

“I said _nothing_ ,” Baëkhyun says. 

“Come on.” 

“I just only wonder, you know,” Baëkhyun says. “How do I know you’re telling me the truth?” 

“W-We’re—”

“Friends, I know,” Baëkhyun smiles. “I know. But—”

“But what?” 

“But I wonder,” Baëkhyun says. “Don’t you wonder?” 

“About what?” 

“About me,” Baëkhyun says. “About my loyalties.” 

“I-I guess I never really thought about it,” Baekhyun says. “Since we started, I just always kinda felt like—”

“Like we’d never have to fight again?” 

“Y-Yeah,” Baekhyun says softly. “I don’t want to fight you anymore.” 

“Good,” Baëkhyun says. 

“Good?” 

“Yeah, good,” Baëkhyun says. “Because I don’t want to fight you either.” 

Baekhyun’s stomach pulls with want, with desire, with all of those tight, hot emotions. He bites at his lip, and Baëkhyun mimics him. It draws Baekhyun’s eye. The white of his teeth. The red of his lip. 

Baëkhyun surges forward from where he sits, and sooner rather than later, Baekhyun’s back is against the dirt, Baëkhyun’s hands holding Baekhyun’s wrists above his head. 

“What are you doing?” Baekhyun asks, his breath coming out cold in the night. 

“Say no,” Baëkhyun says. 

“What?” 

“If you don’t want it, you have to say no,” Baëkhyun whispers, and he leans down so slowly, so torturously slow that when Baekhyun sucks in air, it feels like knives against his lungs. “Say no.” 

But Baekhyun doesn’t want to say no. All he wants to say is yes. 

Baëkhyun presses his lips against Baekhyun’s, a soft, chaste kiss in the dark. Baekhyun breathes against him, their bodies warm against the earth. He gives, arching up against him, hands held down. _This is vulnerability_ , he thinks _this is shattered glass._

Baëkhyun licks into his mouth, and Baekhyun moans through it. He was right all along. They are the same coin. The same side. He can’t pretend like he hadn’t thought about it. He can’t act like they are so different. He knows now, knows for sure. This is the end of their fighting. The rest can go on bickering and killing and dying. He’ll never do anything for the rest of his life except for love. Love with his whole heart. 

“Tomorrow,” Baëkhyun whispers, fingers tight around the bones of Baekhyun’s wrists. “It’s getting late now, but there’s still time. Tomorrow, meet me here. Bring a bag. Anything you need. Supplies. Food.” 

“Where are we going?” 

“We’re going away. We’re going somewhere safe.” 

“R-Really?” Baekhyun asks. “But what if they find us?” 

“Then they can kill us,” Baëkhyun says simply. “But it would be worse than never having tried to get out.” 

His eyes are streaked with gold, like sun rays in the clear sky. 

Baekhyun leans up with a sudden jerk to kiss Baëkhyun hard. When he’s through, he lies back down on the ground, Baëkhyun’s hands still holding his wrists. 

“I’ll only be able to meet you tomorrow if you let me go now,” Baekhyun smiles. 

“I love you, you know,” Baëkhyun says. “I really love you. I could kill you, but I love you.” 

“I know,” Baekhyun says. “I love you too.” 

Baëkhyun lets him up, and they pack up their things. Baekhyun steps on the fire, giving Baëkhyun a soft kiss before he turns to go. 

“Don’t get caught,” Baëkhyun whispers. 

“I won’t.”  
  


✂

Baekhyun meets him at the spot, and they walk together, hand in hand.

“Where are we going?” 

“A warehouse a couple miles from here,” Baëkhyun says. “And if they don’t come find us by morning, we can just keep running. We can just… just go forever. Never stop.” 

Baekhyun likes that idea, never stopping, so he squeezes Baëkhyun’s hand in his, enjoying the midnight stroll. 

His feet ache by the time they arrive, and the warehouse looks all but abandoned from the outside. Baekhyun holds light in the palm of his hand, looking around. It is not _unclean_ , he realizes. Someone has been caring for this place. There is a bathroom, a small kitchenette, and lots of empty space. A small couch that looks a little dingy, but serviceable. And then, in the corner of the room, there is a rickety bed frame with a mattress, a made bed. White sheets. Baekhyun steps closer to it, and he sets down his bag. It smells fresh. Like fresh laundry. 

“How did you find this place?” he wonders. 

“I dunno,” Baëkhyun says. “It was a long time ago. And I started, I dunno, making it look a little better. Cleaning.” 

Baekhyun turns, sees Baëkhyun’s blue eyes going so, so dark. 

“Sometimes I would come just to escape the noise,” Baëkhyun says. “And then once we started to become friends, I thought maybe I could bring you here sometime.” He looks into Baekhyun’s eyes. “I hadn’t realized I was planning for this, not until I kissed you.” 

Baekhyun feels his whole body go heavy with emotion as he toes off his shoes, kneeling on the bed. Baëkhyun does the same, and he takes Baekhyun’s hips in his hands. 

“Are you sure this is what you want?” Baëkhyun asks. “If there was ever a time to say no, it’s now.” 

“This is what I want,” Baekhyun says. “I want you.” 

Baëkhyun groans, bringing their bodies together in a tight line. 

“This?” he asks. 

“Yes,” Baekhyun whispers. “This.” 

They come together in a passionate kiss, dripping with wanton pleasure. Baekhyun lets himself be pressed into the bed, and he squeezes his eyes shut as Baëkhyun begins to kiss down his neck. 

“I’ve always wanted you like this,” Baëkhyun murmurs, the rumble of the words dancing tantalizingly along Baekhyun’s skin. “I knew you would look so fucking good like this.” 

A surprised moan escapes him as Baëkhyun reaches between them, a hand on Baekhyun’s cock through his pants. 

“I’ve never wanted anything so bad,” Baëkhyun whispers. “I love you so much, it fucking hurts.” 

Baekhyun moans as he begins to strip Baëkhyun of his clothing, the fire growing between them, breathed to life. First the shirt, then his pants shrugged down and kicked off the bed. Baekhyun kisses along Baëkhyun’s shoulders, hands roaming as he tries to memorize every scar, every fresh bit of skin. Everything about him is lovely and beautiful and so fucking _hot_. 

“Tell me how you want it,” Baëkhyun says. “You want me inside you?” 

Baekhyun doesn’t get a chance to answer, not as Baëkhyun pulls him out of his clothes. His cock leaks through his underwear, leaving a wet, obvious spot. Baëkhyun grins down at it, catlike and sweet as he lowers himself between Baekhyun’s legs. 

“You like that idea, baby?” Baëkhyun asks, fingers tracing over Baekhyun’s cock through the cloth. “You like being underneath me?” 

“Yes,” Baekhyun says, the words slipping out between his teeth. 

“You wanna give it all to me?” 

“Yes,” Baekhyun says. 

“You wanna belong to me?” 

“Yes.” 

“Say it,” Baëkhyun tells him. “Say it out loud, so I can hear you.” 

“I wanna belong to you,” Baekhyun whispers, hand so hard along Baëkhyun’s forearm that he thinks he might bruise his skin. “I want every part of me to belong to you.” 

“Once I get inside you, I don’t think I’m gonna wanna come out,” Baëkhyun whispers, and he lowers his mouth, ghosting hot breath over the head of Baekhyun’s cock through his underwear. He sucks the slick away from the fabric, and Baekhyun’s hips buck on their own accord. “Does that feel good?” 

“Yes,” Baekhyun moans. “Yes, _God_.” 

“You like it when I touch you? When I kiss you?” 

“Yes.” 

“Say it,” Baëkhyun says.

“I like it,” Baekhyun moans. “I like it, please.” 

“Please what?” Baëkhyun asks, gently peeling the band of Baekhyun’s underwear down. “Hm? Please what?” 

“Touch me.” 

“Ask nicely,” Baëkhyun bids. 

“Please touch me,” Baekhyun whispers. “Please.” 

Baëkhyun grins, splitting Baekhyun’s legs with his hands before bending them at the knee. He pulls the underwear down, locking Baekhyun’s knees together before pulling the fabric down and over his feet. He takes them in a hand, balls them up in a fist, and throws them to the side before spreading Baekhyun’s legs again, covering the insides of his thighs with kisses. 

Baekhyun shudders, writhes as Baëkhyun kisses him, licks at him, slicks him up and fingers him open. It’s like nothing he’s ever felt before, electric and psychotic and _too good to be true_ , but when Baëkhyun pushes inside him, there is no question. It is real, and it is heaven on Earth. 

“You feel so fucking good,” Baëkhyun whispers, pressing a kiss to the lobe of Baekhyun’s ear. “I wanna fuck you forever. I wanna stay inside you forever.” 

Baekhyun moans, heart clattering inside him as he fastens his arms around Baëkhyun’s neck. He could die, and it would be okay. This moment of ultraviolet light, colors unnamed… it could keep him alive even after he’s dead. 

Baëkhyun thrusts inside, and Baekhyun cries out, feet planted in the bed as he seeks to meet him. 

“How did we go so long without this?” Baëkhyun asks, mouth on Baekhyun’s neck. “Why did we ever fight when we could have been doing this instead?” 

Baekhyun wishes he had a better answer, wishes he had something smart to say, but his head has gone blank, full of nothing but love and pretty, silly thoughts. Why guns instead of glitter? Why blood instead of bioluminescence? 

They fuck like the morning is the end, like it will kill them to see daylight. Baekhyun buries all of his sounds, his little leaked pleasure moans by Baëkhyun’s neck, kisses them into his skin. They might look like bruises when the sun hits their skin, but it doesn’t matter now. Everything’s black. Everything’s drowning in shadows. 

“Come inside me,” he whimpers, and he holds his legs around Baëkhyun’s body, ankles locked around him. “Please. Come inside me.” 

It’s rapture like nothing else. Pleasure all-encompassing, draped over them and wrapping them up so tightly. His body moves, takes what it wants as Baëkhyun spills inside him, as he fills him up until it leaks back out. He comes, letting the joy and the love and the unadulterated lust consume him, bathe him in flames until it’s so hot that they have to separate, until it’s so sticky sweet that they can’t possibly touch any longer. 

He wipes sweat away from his forehead as Baëkhyun grabs his bag, grabs a towel. _To clean him with_ , Baekhyun realizes, and _God_ , it just makes him want him so much fucking more. 

He reaches down between Baëkhyun’s legs, touches his soft cock. 

“What are you doing?” Baëkhyun asks, gingerly kissing the side of Baekhyun’s face. 

“I feel like… like I can’t get enough,” Baekhyun whispers, hand stilling. 

“Don’t worry,” Baëkhyun whispers back, like he doesn’t want to break the quiet. “We’ve got all the time in the world.” 

He hopes. He desperately hopes.  
  


✂

The alarm assault comes as the light fractures through the window. Baekhyun stretches, and he clicks on his comm.

“What are you doing?” Baekhyun asks sleepily. 

“Can he hear us?” Sehun asks. “Can that asshole hear us?” 

“Tell him we’ve got the place surrounded,” Chanyeol says. “Tell him to let you go.” 

“See, this is why I hate these guys,” Baëkhyun says, and he takes Baekhyun’s wrist in his hand, pressing the comm button. “He’s staying here. You wanna know why? Not because I’m keeping him. Not because I’m threatening him, but because he wants to suck my dick. Because he can’t get enough of it.” 

Baekhyun floods with heat, wrenching his wrist away. 

“Did you have to do that?” Baekhyun asks. 

Baëkhyun shrugs with a smile. “Got my point across, didn’t I? Plus, you’re the one who said it.” 

“I regret that now,” Baekhyun says, and he presses his button. “Junmyeon?” 

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna do,” Junmyeon’s calm voice says. “I’m serious, if he’s hurting you—”

“He’s not hurting me,” Baekhyun says, and he shuts his eyes, feeling a bit braver in the dark. “I love him.” 

He’s greeted by silence. Then—

“So he was being serious?” Jongdae’s voice asks. “You’re sucking his dick?” 

Baekhyun scoffs. He presses the button. “Just go home. I can’t leave now. I… I don’t want to leave.” 

“They’re here,” Sehun’s voice says, and if Baekhyun wasn’t as close to him, he wouldn’t be able to hear the fear. “Hurry.” 

And then, he hears the rest of them advance. The other half. 

“Don’t,” Baekhyun says. “Don’t fight.” 

“We’ve got to fight,” Minseok says. “It’s the only thing we have left now.” 

Baëkhyun takes his wrist, body covering Baekhyun’s. 

“Tell them he’s here with me,” Baëkhyun says. “Tell them we can talk this way. We can communicate. Negotiate.” 

“They don’t wanna talk,” Kyungsoo says. “They just want us dead.” 

“They want to talk,” Baëkhyun says, “I promise.” 

Radio silence, and Baekhyun clings to Baëkhyun’s body like it was a liferaft. There is nothing, but in the distance, if he closes his eyes, he thinks he can hear yelling. Then, a miracle. 

“You in there with him?” 

It is Junmyeon’s voice, but—but it is not Junmyeon, Baekhyun realizes. 

“Yes,” Baëkhyun answers. 

“What they say is true?” 

“Yes,” Baëkhyun answers. 

The comm shuts down after that, and they hold each other in the middle of the dawn. It is the longest moment of Baekhyun’s life, stretching on and on. Then, the sound of static. Then, the sound of victory.

“Come home,” Junmyeon says. “The war is over.” 

Baekhyun looks at Baëkhyun with wide, hopeful eyes. All he can see is starlight. 

“Put on clothes,” Baëkhyun says. “Let’s go see for ourselves.” 

And so they dress, and they walk from the warehouse hand in hand. For a terrible moment, Baekhyun thinks it must be a trick, but when they come upon the clearing, the groups are standing there like they’ve got no idea what to do next. 

“Is this really it?” Baëkhyun asks his Junmyeon. “Is it really over?” 

“You’re the one who bears the scars,” his Junmyeon shrugs. “Who am I to tell you no?” 

“What do we do now?” Baëkhyun asks. 

“Whatever,” his Junmyeon says, turning to Baekhyun’s Junmyeon with a shrug. “Whatever we like.” 

They turn to each other, Baëkhyun and Baekhyun. 

Whatever they want.  
  


✂

Baekhyun knew a few things before, but now he knows he didn’t know anything at all.

Years pass like days. 

They build a house from nothing. 

They live by the mountain. 

They kiss every morning, every afternoon, and every midnight. 

All he knows now is that the bottom of the ocean tastes like figs.  
  


✂

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday to the bonk queen herself. i love u very much and i am so happy to count you as my friend. i hope this wasnt too weird and that it fills a bit of the baekbäek void that's always in your heart. thank you so much for bringing joy to my life and for always being a source of sunlight when i need it most. ill never be able to repay you for all the kindness you've shown me. thank u again and happy birthday, my friend! i hope this wasnt too weird hehe


End file.
